From the article, Shopping for Children
in the International Marketplace by Kim Park Nelson, I thought it was
interesting how they “Warn against offering gifts or support to birthmothers or
families, arguing that adoptive parents’ responsibilities are to the child and
not to his or her parents and relatives, with an additional caution that if
adoptive parents give the birthmother anything, she will be back to solicit
them again” (Nelson, pg. 101). I always thought that by assisting the birth
parents it would show gratitude and a way of appreciation but then the author
related to it as “baby buying”. This is compelling because even though they
want the best for the child they do not want anything to do with the birth
parents and it sounds like as if they are in it just for the baby.
According to Pertman, there are many
ways how adoptive parents can help their child in regard with their different
ethnicity. This can be beneficial so they can develop as to understand who they
are. Pertman pointed out, “Establishing role models and making friends of that
race or ethnicity, and perhaps even moving to a new neighborhood, so their sons
and daughters can grow up among peers and adults who look like them” (Pertman,
pg. 67). These are very good suggestions to help the child deal with who they
are and how to seek support.
An ethical question that I have from the Nelson reading is, is it ethical for the adoptive parents to just want the birth parents child and nothing else with the birth parents?
An ethical question that I have from the Nelson reading is, is it ethical for the adoptive parents to just want the birth parents child and nothing else with the birth parents?
An ethical question that I have from the
Pertman reading is, is it ethical to assimilate the adopted child into the
adoptive family as quickly as possible so they can not relate to their past or
who they are?
Chia C.
Graded Blog Reply #8
ReplyDeleteI think you bring up many good points in your blog. I was especially intrigued with your point in regards to Nelson’s view of gift giving.
We had previously talked in class about a situation with Haiti adoption where an adoptive mother sent bargain clothes to the birthmother so that she could sell them. I thought that overall this gesture was one of kindness where both parties benefitted without any harm to the child. After our discussion in class and Nelson’s reading though, it seems that my original judgment (and apparently yours as well) on the subject is not the only way to interpret the situation. I can definitely see Nelson’s view on how gift giving can be interpreted as baby buying, which we determined in class is obviously morally wrong. I do think, however, there is a delicate balance between helping somebody and buying somebody.
Once a child is adopted, I believe there are some circumstances where an adoptive parent can morally send money or gifts to a birthparent. If the birthparents are stable, then the child will be more likely to keep in contact with the birthparents, which may benefit the child’s well being. Going back to the example in the article “Haiti’s ‘Orphan’ Crisis” where the adoptive mom sent goods back to her daughter’s birth family, I still believe that this is morally sound. As quoted in the article, “Keballah still enjoys close contact with her Haitian mother. And whenever Ms. Pruett can, she sends money or goods back to the family” (Gauthier-Villars, pg. 1). In this case I think the benefit to the child and the family outweighs the possible downfalls to gift giving. Overall, it is a delicate balancing act.
Julie Thurmes