Blog Post 2, Option 2- Julie Thurmes

 Blog Post 2, Option 2

When reading the chapters in Solinger’s book, I came to realize some of the dangers in language choice when it comes to adoption. In the reading Solinger stated, “almost everybody believes that on some level, birthmothers make a choice to give their babies away” (Solinger, pp. 67). I must admit at the beginning of this reading I was under the false impression that birthmothers made some sort of a choice, albeit a difficult one, to give their babies away. Solinger has opened my eyes to the reality that “adoption is rarely about mothers’ choices; it is, instead, about the abject choicelessness of some resourceless women” (Salinger, pp. 67).

            The word “choice” carries a deeper meaning in relation to adoption than I had first believed. “Choice” implies that there was more than one option. In adoption during the time periods discussed in Salinger’s chapters, there truly was no other option given to many of these women. Salinger discusses how many of the birthmothers at the time were unaware of the resources they had access to, thus forcing them to give up their child.  An example of this is when a woman who worked for the Illinois Department of Public Aid found said, “Oh my god, this was available to me…nobody told me about it” after finding out years later that she had been eligible for public aid  (Salinger, pp. 76). Besides the lack of resources that many of these women experienced, they also had parents, doctors, and birth fathers who were emotionally and physically forcing them to put their children up for adoption. There really was no choice involved for many of these women when it came to their adoption process,  thus using the word “choice” is inaccurate.

            The word “choice” has its faults when it comes to adoption, so what word should replace it? Solinger suggests the word “rights” should be used more often. In the reading it is discussed that birth mothers have the right to mother their children, even under difficult circumstances, and I agree. That is not to say that a child should not be taken from dangerous and abusive homes if necessary, but rather that a mother’s circumstance, such as being a single mother, does not give anyone the right to take a child away from that mother, as was once believed. Salinger explained this concept well when he said, “the choice of a middle-class couple to adopt a baby had to be counterweighted by the birthmother’s right to be the mother of her child” (Solinger, pp. 96). Respecting this concept gives the birth mother more power when deciding on adoption. I believe it is important that we continue to support the rights of birth mothers, adopted children, and adoptive parents so that the adoption process can be a positive one for all involved.

 Julie Thurmes